Girija Kalyana is a Fair&Lovely ad

The first time I read Girija Kalyana I was shocked! Of course, the revelation of the reason for this shock was my inner struggle with my complex about my complexion. Well I will save my agony for later. But let us analyse what I feel about it.

 

Parvati, is the daughter of Himalaya King Giriraj. She falls in love with Shiva right from her childhood. Remember that the idea of god and human was not corrupted then as it was in later ages! Then you didn’t belong to a religion, but to a cult. You were A Vaishnava, A Kaapalika, A Shaiva, A Mardhava, etc etc. so every cult had a supreme leader and their own way of life and followings. Now Shiva was a Shudra! Shocking right! Yeah he was a god of the under privileged. Our puranas are filled with demons who worship Shiva. And Shiva even protects them. Shiva lives in a graveyard in the cold mountains of Himalaya. He wears the skin of dead animals as his attire. Is very vulnerable. Smears the ash of the dead over his body. Has a snake around his neck as an ornament. Is pensively moody. Eats raw flesh. Basically he is not a cool guy and a party ruiner. And as many hot women in college fall to the most ugly looking last bencher, Parvat has fallen in love with Shiva. Now Shiva after testing her, which is a long story, accepts her and falls in love with her. Now Parvati’s father gives his consent to the marriage without even having a look at Shiva, just to make his daughter happy.

 

Now on the day of the marriage, when the whole Kingdom is decorated for the celebration, Giriraja hears the sound of battle drums, Conch blowing, animals unseen on earth bellowing and walking, while shuddering the ground beneath, all happening at outside the gate. Giriraja suspects it to be a battle cry from some neighbouring kingdom. So he goes up to the tower and sees the scene before him and is flabbergasted. Shiva in his actual form is coming riding on the Bull (Nandi). His Ganas (servants of grave) are dancing and are completely drunk! They look like ugly demons. Many demon kings have joined the party. These are the people who never eat any vegetable and don’t know what cleanliness is anything about. The female demons are drunk too, and they are beating drums and are getting more intoxicated by the music. As if that was not enough they are making noises that scared the shit out of every child in the kingdom. And the stink! It is the stink that you get when a human body rots!

Giri raja is shocked after seeing all this and he takes a firm stand. “If there is a war, so be it. But I won’t let my daughter marry that ugly bull rider. Not till I am alive.” So the procession stops at the gates of the Kingdom and the king announces his decision. Now the moody Shiva is enraged and is about to wage a war. But then Vishnu, flies from his abode and comes to the rescue. According to the story, he convinces Shiva to give up his way of life and then makes them bathe in the rivers of Himalayas, makes them apply some sandal paste and other things, gets them decorative robes and makes them wear them. Even Nandi is decorated like the horses in marwadi marriages. And then he tells Himalayan King, now listen to this, ‘they have realised their mistakes, and have changed their way of life’! the king sees the new procession which has had a makeover and is delighted. The marriage happens.

 

Maybe the writers of this story, wanted to highlight Vishnu and the best way was to make Shiva listening to him and agreeing to whatever he says. Remember then we were not Hindus. We were Vaishnavas or Shudras or Shaivas etc. So Girija Kalyana might be a Vaishnava story. But my question is, How on earth did the proud Shiva, acquiesce to give up his roots, even for a day, when he was so proud a bout it! Second, if you closely observe, there was a chance for two cultures to co exist. But it couldn’t. If you are interested in studying social behaviour, you would know that the concept of co existence of two cultures on equal ground is never possible. Whenever there has been a clash of two cultures, then the dominating culture always demolishes the other one. And the lower one always compromises and starts making changes to please the dominating force to get its place. We call it the Marga & Desi Samskriti. Marga being the dominating one, Desi being the subdued.

Whenever there is an inter caste or inter religion marriage, most of the times one of the partner forgets his/her identity and completely dissolves into the one dominating. The concept of co existence is a myth. Look at what is perceived today as beauty. Earlier our heroines and even our women were voluptuous, had round body. They were the symbols of affluence. But post globalisation the dominating view of America, of what is beauty has hit us. So the concept of heroines being so slim as the starved girls of Somalia, a complete American view, has entered here and any girl whose stomach is so close to her visible ribs is called hot! These models, I really can’t ogle looking at them, because they are so miserably thin! Deepika Padukone in Om Shanti Om was wearing so deep neckline and there was nothing to peek in. But! Everyone believes she is hot because, it is a dominating view and if you don’t succumb, the you are not allowed in the marriage procession. There was a time in our history, before the entry of the british, that black men and women were considered to be beautiful. Because Krishna (Saanwra) was black! But post British Raj, you have to be white dude! You have to spend your money on Fair & Lovely/Handsome. What’s your problem? When Shiva himself, applied Fair & Lovely, what is all this talk about co existence and maintaining your identity!

Now I always had, in my school days, a complex about my ‘ugly looks’. It took much maturity to erase the emotion away. But the fact is my ugly looks were determined by the societal perceptions, which are dominated by a dominating perception. It is not easy to fight it. Shiva understood it and changed. Remember if you don’t, you will not get the girl you love. But Girija Kalyana is an unfinished story. Because I remember reading somewhere, that after many years, when Parvati’s friends meet her they ask, “How do you sleep with a man so ugly?” and Parvati replies, “You are so blind at your perception of good looks, that you will never experience the real womanhood with the real man. It is so great that you don’t want to go to sleep, because it will end for this day. But you decide to sleep, so that you can experience for another day.” Now that’s the naughtiest answer any wife could have given & at the same time the most truthful one. So though Girija Kalyana is a mirror to the society’s dumbness. Parvati’s answer is a solution. And that’s why no matter how much the cosmetics company spends on its advertising, it will never convince me to buy them. You see, Parvati was right.